Load of Nightmare
by Mongoose
Summary: Has Zelgadis really found a way to return to being a human? What strange destiny awaits Jillas? Can Martina solve the mystery of her husband's adultering antics? And how exactly does Animal God Official Xellos fit into everything?
1. Wax On

AUTHOR'S NOTES: This fic contains adult situations, non-canonical pairings, blatant mischaracterizations, cheap shots at several fandoms, Gaav's trenchcoat, and trilobites. It's also a work of fiction that's not supposed to be taken seriously, so if you take all of that into account, hopefully you'll be able to read this and have a good laugh. 

The opening text comes courtesy, once again, of Babelfish (http://babel.altavista.com/sites/babelfish/tr). "Brute Shinto Priest" comes courtesy from another wacky translation program, and I'd like to thank one of my friend's _so_ much for that one (you know who you are). 

This story takes place in the same messed-up universe as my story "All in a Day's Work," so it might serve you if you went and read that, especially since people tell me that Animal God Official Xellos is pretty nifty. 

* * *

**Load of Nightmare**

A passage from a (poorly translated) copy of the Claire Bible in regards to the Sea of Chaos: 

_Mother of all darkness. True main thing of competition of monster. The longs which recovers one some original form. The darkness which exceeds the blackest pitch. It is deep from the deepest night. It shines or, someone in the disordered sea like the gold one. Space among everything. All disordered sources. Everything is terrible there is a dominant right with respect to the dream whose or someone one. At shortage, main thing of non- pleasant sensation. _

Load of Nightmare 


	2. Wax Off

Zerosu was a bit shocked for a few reasons. 

First of all, he had not expected that his prayers to Inari would have been answered in this way. But it wasn't that he didn't appreciate that Inari had decided to send along one of his Celestial Foxes as a guardian--quite the contrary. He was ecstatic beyond all belief to have been deemed so worthy! 

He was just wondering why this particular guardian was wearing nothing but an eyepatch and was huddled in the corner shaking wildly. 

"O servant of Inari! I am deeply honored to be in your presence," Zerosu said, figuring that Inari probably had his reasons for everything. The naked fox stared at him fearfully with his single eye. The priest was confused. "Please, I am entirely willing to accept your help! How am I to resolve my problems with this Xellos?" 

The peculiar fox's ears perked up as he spoke Xellos' name. So the fox _did_ know why he was here after all! "Xellos?" the fox mirrored, speaking with a bizarre accent with which the priest was unfamiliar. 

"Indeed! Because of _him_, all of the shrine's donations are having to go to forwarding mail to his office! One way or another, that has to stop!" he shouted, brandishing a fist. Zerosu tried to read the expression on the fox's face. There was a sort of knowing look of contempt in his eyes. _He... he knows!_ Zerosu tried to cover for himself. "Er... but I was thinking that maybe I could just go and talk to him, and maybe if he'd be willing to pay for all of the postage, or perhaps even agree to change his name..." _I must not let him know that I'm moved to violence! The Celestial Fox must have been sent to watch me to see that I don't relive my old reputation as the "Brute Shinto Priest."_

The fox stood up, wrapping his tail around himself in order to cover himself. "Xellos, you say? I've a few things I'd like to say to him, myself!" He turned his head back and forth a few times. "Erm... where are we, anyway?" he asked. 

Zerosu smiled. Perhaps this journey would be a fruitful one after all! "I shall explain everything in detail along the way," he told his guardian. "But first, let us get you some robes for travel. As far as I can tell, we have a long road ahead of us." 

-=~=-

Quietly making her way through the trees, Martina tried as best she could to stay on the trail of the mysterious robed sorcerer as he moved through the forest. Martina had to know that her sanity was still intact! She would track this man back to wherever it was he came from, and then get the answers she sought. 

She was extra careful in making sure that she did not accidentally give away her presence. She followed at the largest distance that she could while still keeping track of her target. But things were beginning to worry Martina now. As far as she knew, there were no villages or towns over in this direction--and being the Queen of Xoana, she would definitely be the one to know! 

This man was getting more and more suspicious every time. 

And so Martina stealthily cut her way through the woods in the night, praying to Zoamelgustar the entire time to watch over her. No risk was too great. This time, for sure, things would be ended, one way or another. She stepped to the side to avoid tripping over a rather large root, and then accidentally clotheslined herself on a low-hanging tree branch. 

Scrambling to her feet, Martina spat out a clump of dirt and dead leaves from her mouth. He wasn't going to get away that easily! Quickening her pace a bit to make up for lost time, Martina quickly found the man in her sighs again, just before he disappeared into a strange ruined building. 

_Why do I have the feeling that this is a bad idea?_ Martina thought to herself. She took out the small crest of Zoamelgustar that she always carried on her. _But my Lord Zoamelgustar is watching over me! I can't possibly fail!_ She began to laugh into the night, then remembered that she was following someone in silence. 

Tiptoeing lightly, Martina made her way over to the entrance of the ruin, and slowly made her way down the stairs below. 

-=~=-

"According to what I can make out from the text, the ritual is pretty complicated and time consuming, but from what is says, I should be able to do it. But I'll need your help," Zelgadis explained to Filia and Amelia. 

Filia had flown him back to Seyruun at full speed. He was having a hard time believing that his quest might finally be over. Amelia had been ecstatic upon his return, and the three of them had eaten quite a banquet in celebration. Zelgadis was still worried about counting his chickens before he hatched, however. 

"I wish that I knew where Miss Lina was!" Amelia said, "I'm sure she'd love to be here for this!" 

"Maybe," Zelgadis responded somewhat unenthusiastically. "But maybe it's for the best. Trouble seems to follow Lina a bit too much for my comfort." 

"So what exactly are we going to have to do, Zelgadis?" Filia asked, turning her attention back to the matter at hand. 

"It's all outlined in detail here in the text. Surprisingly enough, it doesn't seem so much difficult as it does time-consuming. All things considered, I'm a bit underwhelmed," Zelgadis answered. 

"Oh, I'm so happy for you!" Amelia squealed delightedly as she threw herself into Zelgadis' arms. "Does this mean that you'll be able to stay here in Seyruun with me?" 

Zelgadis smiled and ran his cold, stony hand through her hair, which seemed to make her erk with discomfort. "Hopefully," he answered. _But I still don't want to get my hopes up._

Filia put down her cup of tea, empty. "Do you suppose I could find a place to store these while I'm here?" she asked, gesturing towards the sack of her recent finds from the ruins. 

-=~=-

This "Zerosu" fellow seemed like a decent enough guy in Jillas' mind. At the very least, he seemed like he really wanted to beat the crap out of Xellos, and that was fine in his book. He had no idea what these "eenery" or "shin-toes" were that he kept mentioning, or why he seemed to hang on his every word, but he figured it was best to just go along with him for now. 

Especially if it meant getting to confront Xellos about that convention. Then maybe the nightmares might finally stop. 

"So, Jillas," the priest asked him as they walked, "Going by what you've said, I take it that this Xellos is well known to those in the heavens, is he?" 

"Yes," he responded, trying not to hesitate. Jillas didn't know too much about dark lords and their hierarchies, but he knew that Xellos was pretty well feared by quite a few people. He knew that he and Valgaav certainly didn't get along very well. 

Jillas sighed. He missed Valgaav so much already. He just wished that this whole thing would resolve itself soon so that he could go home. And maybe, if he was lucky, Valgaav would cook him another romantic dinner like before. 

"I imagine if we make good time, we might be able to get there by tomorrow," Zerosu said. "And when we do, we'll set things right, won't we?" The priest chuckled to himself. Jillas heard the man mutter something under his breath, but couldn't quite make out what it was. 

And so the pair kept walking, perhaps a bit faster now. Jillas kept the image of his Valgaav's lovely face in his mind to keep him going. 

-=~=-

Gaav slashed his sword through the air at nothing, just because Gaav was good like that. 

A freshly renewed sense of purpose and manliness filled him now that he had reassembled his old ensemble. True, this trenchcoat wasn't quite as comfortable as his old one, but it was the look that was important, and he took great pride in knowing that he looked damn cool right about now. He only hoped that he would get the chance to fight sometime reasonably soon: he loved showing off his three-headed dragon form. 

But no--for now, other things were more important. First of all, Gaav could sense that the magical barrier was gone. This could mean only one thing: Hellmaster Phibrizzo must be dead. Gaav was both elated and saddened by this all at once. He was quite happy that the little punk was finally gone. He was just a little upset that he hadn't been the one to make it that way. 

_Perhaps Valgaav finished him off for me. I'll ask him for all of the details once I find him._

Tracking down Valgaav was proving to be no easy task. After all, it wasn't like he could just go up to random people on the street and ask them if they had seen a green-haired, black-winged, short-tempered minion of evil anywhere. And even if he had wanted to do so, most people ran and locked themselves inside their houses whenever he walked by. That made him feel good, at least. 

Gaav smiled. Sooner or later, he would find Valgaav, and then, everything could be back to the way it should be. 

-=~=-

_"...and so after you kill Amelia and resurrect her as a Mazuko, she sort of becomes your evil bride. This doesn't sit well with the vengeful ghost of Lina, so she..."_

Xellos brought down his staff hard, splintering his desk neatly in two. He let out a painfully angered scream, and a look of fire reflected in his eyes (which was well to be expected, because he was shooting fire from his hands). He burned files, knocked over drawers, and smashed cabinets. 

_The Greater Beast can take this job and stuff it! I can't take it anymore! Insipid plots! Money-grubbing raccoons! Plushophiles! People who can't take three seconds out of their lives to learn how to properly spell 'Mazoku!' I want them all to **die**! I want to kill them all until they are **beyond** dead! And then I'll kill them some more!_

_But most importantly, I want **OUT** of this horrible job!_

With a blast of dark energy, Xellos shot the door off of its hinges. He stormed out through the doorway and down the hall, cape billowing behind him in the smoke from what was once the Animal God Official's office. 

-=~=-

Filia and Amelia circled around Zelgadis with long pointed sticks, inscribing a rather complex mystical pattern which, coincidentally enough, looked remarkably like an obscene physical gesture used in Zephilia if one were to view it in a mirror. The two shrine maidens proved to be ideally suited to this task, because, for whatever reason, the manuscript specifically called for this to be done by a blond-haired and a black-haired girl. 

"So, after this, it says we need to place four white candles in each of the primary directions, and then four black candles need to go exactly halfway between them on the perfectly circular arc formed by the original four candles," Zelgadis said. "Then, we have to light each of them in order, every hour, on the hour, starting from the northeast." 

"Zelgadis, this ritual sounds _awfully_ complicated," Filia said in response. "Are you sure that you want to go through with this?" 

"But Miss Filia, he _has_ to, can't you see!" Amelia protested. "Besides, we've done everything right so far." 

"I guess we're lucky that tonight also happens to be a waxing gibbous moon," Zelgadis added. Maybe Filia was right about this being a wee bit too complicated, but there was no backing down now. 

"I still think that you should reconsider!" Filia said sternly. "This could be very dangerous!" 

Amelia finished tracing her portion of the pattern into the earth. "Miss Filia, I will not hear your attempts at trying to weasel out of this anymore! Just because you don't want to perform a holy ritual outside while wearing fishnet stockings doesn't mean that you have to ruin Zelgadis' dream over it!" 

-=~=-

Whatever it was that Martina had been expecting, it certainly hadn't been this. 

It looked like it was some sort of laboratory. Strangely enough (or perhaps not so), it seemed much more recent than the building itself. The air was chill and stale, kind of like the bread she used to have to eat after Lina had first Dragon Slaved her castle into nothingness. At the very least, the air itself wasn't moldy or anything. Regardless, Martina quivered with fear, clutching her icon of Zoamelgustar as if she were holding on to life itself. 

The lights suddenly went dark, and Martina shrieked. 

"Well, what do we have here?" The voice was cold and flat, and Martina couldn't exactly place what direction it came from. Soon enough, though, the lights returned, and Martina was face-to-face with the sorcerer whom she had butchered time and time again. 

"_You!_ What are you doing? Why won't you _die?_ And why are you sleeping with my husband?" Martina demanded loudly. 

He flashed a tiny, amused smile. "Why indeed," he said. 

"Freeze Arrow!" Martina was too shocked from hearing the wizard's voice coming from _behind_ her this time to have a chance to dodge. The spell struck Martina in the legs, encasing them in ice and freezing her solidly to the floor. Craning her neck as best she could, she saw a man identical to the one standing in front of her. 

"H..._how_..." The trapped queen was flustered beyond comprehension. 

The first man spoke again. "Well, Your Majesty. You've just managed to solve our greatest problem." 

-=~=-

The building which housed the Animal God Official office was near. The goal was finally in sight! Priest Zerosu grinned. Secretly, he hoped that Xellos would prove to be unreasonable and make the first move, thereby giving him more pretense to lash out violently at him. 

"Is... is that it over there?" Jillas asked, sounding quite joyful himself. 

"Indeed, Jillas!" Zerosu responded. "Our business will soon be concluded." _Concluded with the business end of my fists, hopefully._

Jillas had proven to be a welcome--if somewhat unorthodox--traveling companion. He made for good conversation, too. Though something seemed to be distracting him, Zerosu felt. _I suppose it's only natural for messengers of the gods to have many, many things on their minds..._

His fox companion suddenly stopped and pointed. "I think I see smoke, Zerosu!" And he was right. The two of them broke into a run. Zerosu would be _damned_ before he'd let something like a fire rob him of the chance to give this desk clerk a royal beating. 

They got close to the main doors of the building, only to have them burst forward as a wave of fire erupted from the entrance. When the smoke cleared, Brute Shinto Priest Zerosu stood facing the purple-haired reflection of himself. 

-=~=-

"It _is_ you!" Valgaav shouted as he threw himself into Gaav's arms. Gaav was a bit curious as to why Valgaav was completely naked, but he was just happy that his return had been warmly received. 

Gaav ran a big, meaty hand through Valgaav's shiny green hair. "But of course, Val." Could he honestly ever be mistaken for anyone else? Honestly. 

"I... I thought you were dead..." Valgaav said tearfully, looking up into his face. The comparitavely scrawny minion snugged more tightly. 

"I get that a lot," Gaav responded, smiling. He gently kissed Valgaav on the forehead. It was good to be back. Then, out of the corner of his eye, Gaav spotted something out of place. 

"Val... why is there a rose in a vase on your table?" 

Valgaav let out a small erking sound. "Um... because it's pretty. Don't you think it makes this place look nicer...?" 

"Why are both of the chairs out like that?" 

Valgaav hugged him some more. "I... I've always left a spot for you at my table, hoping that one day you'd come back to me! Which reminds me... there's some leftover casserole! Have a seat, I'll go heat some up for you." 

"I'm... not hungry," Gaav responded. "Being vaporized does that to you." But he had to admit--Valgaav _did_ make one _mean_ casserole. Then, something else clicked in Gaav's perception. "There are two sets of dirty dishes on the table," he said flatly. 

With a quick leap, Valgaav wrapped his legs around Gaav. "Make love to me, Gaav-sama!" he cried. "You've been through _so_ much, and I want you to feel good!" 

Gaav looked down at the Ancient Dragon suspiciously. Valgaav was giving him the puppy-dog eyes again. _Aw, what the heck... he's already naked. Why not?_ Without a word, Gaav walked off to the bedroom, carrying Valgaav in his arms. 

Softly, Gaav placed his lover onto the bed, looking into his eyes with a certain weird variety of lust. Valgaav reached up his arms and helped him get his trenchcoat off. One was much freer to explore pleasurable situations when unfettered. Gaav placed his face against Valgaav's, and sniffed deeply. Then, his eyes sprung open. 

"I smell... aroused vulpine..." the Chaos Dragon uttered. 

Valgaav grinned sheepishly. "Er... because you think I'm so foxy?" 

Gaav smiled and leaned in for a kiss. _Yes, that must be it..._ he thought as he was swept away in a wave of passion. 

-=~=-

_"...so we beseech you, forces of the universe...!"_ chanted the fishnet-clad dragon priestess as she juggled the cherry bombs. 

_"...hear the call from the one here who seeks your infinite grace!"_ added the Seyruun princess, the bells on her jester's hat jingling lightly. 

With a really cool audible sound-effect, the mystical pattern suddenly began to glow white-hot, as mystical patterns are often prone to do. The wind picked up, too, as the wind is prone to do during dramatic magical ceremonies. Zelgadis spread his arms, and with all of his breath shouted: 

**_"Return me to my original form!"_**

The last thing that Zelgadis saw was the look of horror on the scantily-clad Amelia's face as his body slowly disintegrated and faded from existence. And even as the very essence of his being left the plane that it inhabited and merged with the Sea of Chaos, he could think only one thing: 

_It figures..._

-=~=-

Gravos stared up at the moon in the sky, letting a cold wind grace his green skin. 

_No one ever writes stories about me,_ he thought with a sigh. 

He hung his head down, and a sole tear streamed slowly down his cheek. 

-=~=-

"It was easy enough to get material with which to make a copy of King Zangulus," the fourth in the line of identical wizards explained. "But our master could hardly expect to take control of Xoana without replacing the queen as well." 

"It was very thoughtful of you to come by," the first added. 

Martina's head spun like a dreidel. "But who _is_ this 'master' you keep mentioning?" she asked. 

The second copy shook his head and eyed her disdainfully. "Just because we're going to kill you doesn't mean we're dumb enough to reveal _all_ of our dramatic secrets, you know." 

Martina watched in horror as a perfect clone of herself continued to grow inside of the freaky glass tube, next to the as-of-yet-unanimated Copy Zangulus. "You're never going to get away with this! The--" 

"The wrath of the Monstrous Lord Zoamelgustar?" the first copy said with a sneer. "We would be best advised to take extra steps to make sure that our Copy Martina has some better dialogue." 

And so slowly, the copy in the tube finished assembling inside of the twisted laboratory. Martina closed her eyes, and just hoped that everything would end quickly as the fourth magician held a palm out. "Goodbye, Your Highness," he said, flatly as ever. 

"...do I have to remind you why we're here _again_, jellyfish-brains?" The voice came echoing from down the hallway--a painfully familiar voice. 

"Well, I know you said something about trying to find something that might help cure Zel, but..." The echo in the man's voice indicated that the pair was coming closer. 

"...and I _already_ said four times that the reason why we came _here_ is because that map I found in the bandits' lair indicated that there was someplace really suspicious here, and so..." Lina stopped talking as she stepped out in the laboratory, blinking several times. 

"Hey, I remember you!" Gourry called out, pointing at Martina. 

"_Vrumugun?_" Lina asked in shock. The four Vrumuguns turned to face her simultaneously. 

"You said you destroyed that map!" Vrumugun Two shouted at Vrumugun Four. 

"I gave it to _him_!" Vrumugun Four shouted back as he pointed to Vrumugun Three. 

Martina whimpered. _Oh, please, Lord Zoamelgustar... not Lina Inverse! **Anybody** but Lina Inverse!_

"Hey guys, why don't you let _me_ end your little argument!" Lina shouted as she cupped her hands. "Fire..." She pulled her hand back, readying for the pitch. Martina clamped her eyes shut, muttering Zoamelgustar's name to herself over and over again. "...**_BALL!_**" 

Martina screamed piercingly as the laboratory began to explode around her. 

-=~=-

Brute Shinto Priest Zerosu's sucker-punch connected with Animal God Official Xellos' jaw so hard that Jillas was expecting the bone to fly right off. But instead, Xellos regained his balance and swung his staff upwards, neatly cracking Zerosu in the side of the head. 

Now that he saw them side-by-side, Jillas noticed for the first time that two of them looked exactly alike one another, even down to the eyes, which glimmered like a freshly-sliced Indian River Ruby Red grapefruit... well, aside from the fact that Zerosu was bald. The resemblance was still uncanny though, and he had the urge to smack himself for not having noticed sooner. 

With a whishing sound, Xellos disappeared and reappeared hovering in midair. "My, how unsportsmanlike of you," he called down at Zerosu. "And here I thought you had come to say that you had found Jillas wandering as a stray somewhere after his last convention appearance!" 

Jillas winced and sighed. He wasn't going to get the chance to talk to Xellos about that incident anytime soon, was he? 

"Come down and face me like a man, evil creature!" Zerosu called, waving his fists, and shuffling his feet like a professional boxer. 

"Like a man?" Xellos laughed. "Is that what you call punching someone when they're trying to ask your name?" 

Jillas took a few more steps back from Zerosu. He had the feeling that things were going to turn even uglier really fast. 

"Admit it!" Zerosu shouted back. "You're just afraid of me! That's why you won't--" Zerosu was cut short as a swarm of black cones began to strike at his body. "What manner of trickery is _this?_" he exclaimed. 

"I'd love to tell you that, really... but _that_ is a secret!" Xellos mocked gleefully. 

Jillas turned tail and started to run. Today was not a good day to die. 

"Servant of Inari, where are you going?" Zerosu shouted. "Aren't you my guardian? Destroy him with your fox-magic!" 

But Jillas just kept running, running, and running, hoping that Lord Valgaav would keep him safe tonight. 

-=~=-

Gaav was half-wondering where all of these stray red hairs that were all throughout Valgaav's bedsheets came from. It wasn't the same shade of red as his own luxuriously long hair, and it had a strange consistency. It felt more like fur than hair. 

"Val, what's all of this red fur doing in your bed?" he asked simply. 

Valgaav whimpered and gasped a bit. "Um... I used to have a dog but, er... he ran away. Come on, Gaav-sama, _harder!_" he begged. Gaav accepted that as an answer and gladly complied. 

_Chaos Dragon Gaav..._

A voice was echoing through Gaav's head, which shocked him, because this time, it wasn't even that crazy ferret like last time he started hearing voices in his head. 

_Chaos Dragon Gaav, something is not right with the world. You do not belong here. Someone else has been sent to us in your place._

"What?" Gaav asked the mysterious voice aloud. 

"I said that's hard enough, Gaav-sama!" Valgaav answered, grimacing in pain. "Ah... that's better... wait, Gaav-sama? What's happening?" 

But Gaav didn't know what was happening. He only knew that he lost physical sense of his body, and that everything was going black. Then, the familiar sensation of oblivion washed through he senses again. The last thing he heard before dissipating entirely was Valgaav's frenzied voice. 

"_What the Hell?_ Not again!" 

-=~=-

_Dear Zerosu_, 

The Shinto priest had woken up back in his temple, unharmed. This letter had been placed by his feet. He read on: 

_We deeply regret your accidental death at the hands of Xellos, our Animal God Official. There have been quite a few mix-ups lately, and we sincerely apologize. You have been returned to your own plane of existence, and so the odds of you getting anymore misdirected postal items is quite slim. You also have our assurance that the Animal God Official will be severely reprimanded for his actions. _

Once again, deepest apologies  
    -L

Zerosu put down the letter. _Whatever,_ he said, and got up to get ready for another day. 

-=~=-

Just because Lina Inverse had saved the day didn't mean that Martina wasn't still wonderfully happy to be back with her Zangulus. 

"...and so then, with the blessing of Lord Zoamelgustar, I was able to destroy their copy-making factory and put an end to their evil scheme!" It also didn't mean that she still wouldn't try to take all the credit for it. 

Zangulus stroked Martina's hair softly. "That's my girl!" he said. "Let us both be thankful to Zoamelgustar that this horrible ordeal is over." 

Martina snuggled up with her husband. "So, what's it like to be under mind control, honey?" she asked. 

"Huh?" Zangulus responded. "Oh, right. Mind control. Yes. You, um... don't want to know." 

And so Queen Martina pressed no further, thanking the Monstrous Zoamelgustar for keeping her together with her beloved King Zangulus. Tomorrow would surely be another wonderful day for the Kingdom of Xoana... 

-=~=-

With the sound of an elastic band snapping, Zelgadis popped back into existence. He was still a chimera, but at least he was alive. 

"...and so this is the spot where he disappeared, Miss Lina," Amelia explained as she and Filia led Gourry and Lina into the courtyard. Her eyes nearly bugged out of her skull as she raised her head and saw him standing there. 

She called his name as she went running up to him and dove into his arms. 

"Um... does this mean you don't need Lina's help?" Gourry asked Amelia. 

"I take it the search didn't go too well, huh Zel?" Lina asked, walking up to him. 

"I suppose not," Zelgadis answered as Amelia still held onto him, crying tears of joy into his robes. "But I have to go again." 

Amelia looked at him, tears still welled up in her eyes. "But why?" she pleaded. "Stay here with me! This quest of yours is too dangerous!" 

Zelgadis gave Amelia a hug. "It's not that. I... have somewhere else to go. I promise I'll be back tomorrow," he said, smiling as much as he could. 

And so Zelgadis left Amelia, Lina, and the rest behind, heading out to journey once more... 

-=~=-

"Hey Val," Jillas asked. "Where'd this trenchcoat come from?" 

"I... I bought it for _you_, because I love you so much, foxy!" Valgaav answered, running his hand through Jillas' tail. 

Jillas smiled. "Oh, Valgaav! I love you too!" he cried as he kissed his lover passionately, letting his fears fade away into the night. 

-=~=-

Animal God Official Xellos eyed his (newly rebuilt) office with relief. His job still sucked, but at least the day was over. But even knowing that, he knew that the worst part of his day was yet to come. 

Xellos slowly walked out of the building, and into the tavern across the street (that had never been there before, incidentally). He climbed up the stairs, and into the third room on the left. Then, he sat down on the bed with his partner-to-be for tonight. 

Zelgadis looked at him with a complete lack of interest. The blush and the lipstick wasn't helping, either. "I... I love you, Xellos," he 'confessed,' all emotion missing from his voice (which, coming from Zelgadis, didn't really mean much). 

Xellos swallowed hard. "I love you too... Lulu," he choked out before taking Zelgadis into his arms, letting his tongue play across the chimera's as little as possible, already vowing that he would never disobey the will of the Greater Beast again... 

-=~=-

A puff of cigarette smoke encircled Zelas Metallium's vision as her right hand idly stroked her left leg, one of the two most perfectly shaped objects in all of creation (the other, of course, being her right leg). Why did her plans always have to be so _deliciously_ perfect? Then, she remembered why. Because she was Zelas Metallium, and _everything_ about her was perfect... 

-=fin=-


End file.
